HOW2: How to Ice Skate

HOW2: How to Ice Skate


– [Pear] Hey everyone,
(light, cheery music) Pear here, with another episode of – [Orange] – Out of the way! Zamboni coming through! Zamboni! Zamboni! – [Pear] Orange, what are you doing? – [Orange] What’s it look like I’m doing? I’m driving a Zamboni and I’m saying the word Zamboni a bunch. (laughs) Yeah, Zamboni,
Zamboni, Zamboni, Zamboni. – [Pear] (groans) Well, I guess it’s good that you’re getting the ice smoothed out ’cause today we’re showing the audience how to ice skate. – [Orange] Sounds great! Zamboni, Zamboni. – [Pear] Stop saying
Zamboni for no reason! – [Orange] (laughs) Yeah. Okay, Zamboni. That was the last Zamboni except for this Zamboni and (laughs) Zamboni. – [Pear] (groans) Can we please, tell these folks how to ice skate already? – [Orange] Yup, let’s get to it, like this Zamboni. – [Pear] Orange! (groans loudly) – [Orange] Step one, when ice skating don’t
accidentally cut off your arm with the blade. – [Pear] (groans) Okay, I’m sorry. That’s step one for beginner
ice skaters to remember? To not cut their arms off? – [Orange] Yup. That’s probably one of the most important
things to remember, honestly. The blood really clogs up the Zamboni, Zamboni, Zamboni (laughs). – [Pear] (groans) Okay. Fine. Don’t chop off your arm. Very important. What’s next? – [Orange] Step two, do a quadruple lutz. – [Pear] Wha-uht? That’s step two? – [Orange] Heck yeah! Zamboni! – [Pear] You don’t think their might be, oh say, a few steps between landing the most difficult trick out there and not chopping off your own arm? – [Orange] Hm, I guess I could get a little more specific. – [Pear] Please do! – [Orange] Okay, step one and 1/2, lace up your skates real tight. – [Pear] Thank you. This is exactly what I’m talking about. – [Orange] Step one and 3/4, when you first go out on the ice use the sidewall for balance. – [Pear] Perfect! This is great Orange. – [Orange] Step one and 7/8, don’t accidentally chop off your own head with the blade. (laughs)
– What? – [Pear] (yelling) Orange! – What? It’s good advice
(woman screaming) – [Pear] You’re not teaching the audience how to do anything. – [Orange] You, Whatchu talkin’ ’bout? I taught them not to chop off their heads. – [Pear] They already knew that! Teach them how to, some day, win a gold medal in ice
skating, or something. – [Orange] Okay, Okay. Yeesh ma-geesh. – [Pear] That’s not a saying. – [Orange] Well, it could be a saying. Zamboni!
(groaning) – [Orange] Step three, when
you’re on the medal podium don’t accidentally get
your head chopped off when they put the gold
medal around your neck. – [Pear] (yelling) Orange!
(slicing sound) (Orange laughing)
(woman screaming) – [Orange] Careful, a Zamboni there. It’s gonna be real slippery.
(Pear yelling) Zamboni, Zamboni, Zamboni,
(painful groans) Zamboni, Zamboni, Zamboni!
(painful crying) Zamboni sandwiches. (“The Blue Danube Waltz” by Stauss)

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